Family Birth Order Study

I've read a lot about birth order and how it affects personalities and outcomes, etc. Firstborn children are often higher achievers, get more schooling, and often have greater financial success. Finally, some people at BYU have done a study that may give us a clue as to why birth order affects who children become.

Its main finding is that parents give more quality time to their firstborn children from the ages of 4-13 than they do with subsequent children between those ages. This is for a number of reasons. Often parents are busier themselves as their children get older, often because of changes in jobs or mothers returning to the workforce; they also tend to get involved in the activities of their older children (i.e., sports) and drag the younger siblings along. Additionally, parents are much more likely to use the TV with younger children than with the oldest, which is not considered quality time. The trends seem to be consistent whether parents have 2, 3, 4, or more children (the youngest in any family tends to get about the same amount of time).

Basically, their conclusions are that parents who want to buck the trend need to spend more time participating in activities with their younger children, whether that be reading or playing together. Additionally, they are pursuing another line of research with the same data set that they believe will show that parental involvement and time trumps money when it comes to children's success later on.

I can already see the difficulty with trying to give both children equal amounts of time. Ryan literally demands a lot of attention and always wants me to play with him or read books with him. I do a lot for Sofia too, but it is mostly attending to physical needs right now (although I do try to get some playtime in as well). But that doesn't even count all the time I have to spend cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc. (we try to make that into quality time, even though it doesn't always/often work). And then I want to have a least a little personal time to write in my journal or my blog, to read, to scrapbook (which is mostly so I can document the family like the journal), or just to decompress.

It is so hard to find a balance, especially when there are so many demands (and more all the time) and I feel so exhausted! But I'm glad that I've read this now so it gives me something to think about.

Do any of you have any secrets for balancing your time?

Bean Museum Birthday Bash!

For all of us born in 1978, this year is a significant milestone (can you believe it's been thirty years?). The Monte L. Bean Museum was also created in 1978, so next week they're having a big birthday bash. Here is their schedule in case anyone would like to join us in celebrating.

Monday: Family Night Activities
Treasure Hunt (5-9pm)
Animal Balloons (6-7:30pm)
Live Animal Show (7:30pm)

Tuesday: Birthday Lunch (it's for people turning 30 and a guest)

Wednesday: Taking pictures with Shasta the Liger (6-8pm)

Thursday: Tanner Lecture on Galapagos Tortoises (7pm)

Friday: Open Collections Night (6-8pm)
They're opening the collections that are normally kept behind closed doors. I know they have amazing things collected, including a nest made out of barbed wire, that I am really anxious to see.

Saturday: Birthday Party
Live animal passports (11am-noon) [No, I don't know what this means]
Birthday cake at noon
Cosmo (1-2pm)
Live animal show (2:15pm)

I am most excited about Monday and Friday, but I also submitted a request to go to the luncheon, which could be fun too!

Planting a Garden

Big thanks to Jenny for helping me out in the back yard today! We dug up a place for a raspberry patch and then she rototilled it and another large patch by the house (go, Wonder Woman!). Ryan had a fabulous time digging around in the dirt and then helping Jen spread fertilizer. The babies both enjoyed the sunshine.

So, I really know nothing about gardening (although I have planted bulbs that have now come up successfully two years in a row). In fact, my track record is pretty bad when it comes to plants. But I've decided that the effort is still worth it. As Nate's mom says, nothing is impossible, so I figure I'll keep trying until I figure it out.

I also decided there are a lot of reasons that I want to garden:

1. It's excellent exercise! I am definitely getting definition in my arms and legs from digging, squatting, etc.
2. It is a great excuse to get me and the kids outside.
3. I really want my kids to know where some of the food they eat comes from.
4. I'd like to be able to grow and preserve some of my own food, partly for self-sufficiency and partly for the feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment that comes from doing it (I'd assume).
5. There is a lot of value in doing things that take time: they teach patience, perseverance, and planning.
6. I'm trying to constantly learn how to do new things. I figure I am only going to grow a few things this year, and if I figure them out (at least enough to not kill them), then we'll add more next year. :D

So I'm getting excited. Here's to a happy growing season!

Free Activities

Nate and I have been doing really well the last month of staying on a budget. I've started developing a list of things to do for free (or really cheap).

• Bean Museum (BYU): Full of animals from all over the world
• Earth Science Museum (BYU): Very small, but it has beautiful rocks and dinosaur skeletons
• Museum of People and Cultures (BYU): Another museum that has a lot of interesting collections, especially Native American artifacts
• Museum of Art (BYU): Offers paintings, photography, permanent and traveling exhibitions, and a peaceful sculpture garden.
• Carillon concerts: Free concerts are sometimes given from the BYU bell tower. The Freedom Festival one will be held June 19 this year.
• Parks: There are so many parks in the area. All of them have fun equipment and provide opportunities to socialize with other parents and kids. One of my favorites is Discovery Park in Pleasant Grove, where you can play in a space shuttle, a volcano, beehives, and play music on all sorts of things.
• Walking/biking/hiking: I can’t wait for spring with warmer weather and Sofia sitting up on her own, so I can do my favorite outdoor activities. We usually walk or bike every day somewhere to run errands, but I also love to hike at least a short distance with Ryan. My favorite biking trail is the Provo River Trail—paved, relatively level, and gorgeous scenery, all so close to my house!
• Temple Square and other church buildings: There are so many activities in and around the area—the Church Museum, the visitor’s centers, tours, free concerts, movies. Additionally, all the construction in the area provides hours of entertainment for little boys.
• Public libraries: Both the Orem and Provo libraries provide scores of free activities, including story hours, puppet shows, movies, family night activities. And we get lots of books and music to take home with us.
• Other free concerts: There are plenty of places to attend free concerts, including BYU, the Provo Tabernacle, and UVU.
• Free days: A lot of places have one or two free days a year, like Hogle Zoo (see the blog below; the next one will be in November) and the Museum of Natural History (their free day will be Monday, March 3). I will have to find out about more free days like these in the area.
• Dinners with friends and family: This is by far one of my favorite activities. I love to get together with the people I love to eat, talk, etc.
• Game Night: I also love to spend time playing games because it provides more opportunities to talk.

In addition, I have joined a book group and have been scrapbooking for free either at people’s houses or at Roberts, which has started a free scrap night once a month. And Nate will start IMFT softball again soon (the whole family goes to watch him play).

So do you have any other free activities that you enjoy doing?

Fun pictures of the kids from February

Trip to the zoo!

My sister-in-law Keri and I took our kids to the Hogle Zoo last Wednesday because it was it's free day.

We had a wonderful time; it wasn't too crowded, the weather was beautiful,

and we got to see the new baby giraffe.

The kids especially enjoyed watching the construction trucks building a new plaza.

Ryan was very pleased to see the elephants.

He sat concentrating with his hands deep in his pockets--he's growing up so fast.